Anxiety Chronicles: COVID and My Anxiety
Hahahahaha, it’s been a minute.
The world is catching up to what most black folks already knew and we’re still HIGH KEY dealing with a world pandemic but also pretending everything is fine.
Basically, the world is dealing with its shit the way I deal with my shit. Avoidance.
But we not here to talk about the world. We here to talk about me and how I’m coping. And my response to that is....I’m not.
I am not dealing well. I actually had to up my dosage on my anti-depressants and most definitely had a full-blown anxiety attack the week before I went back to working in an office. And if I’m being honest. I’m tired. But the bright side is I’m not worn out. I feel like there is a lil light somewhere in this. I won’t call it the light at the end of the tunnel, but it is a light I needed.
So the positives, happy things are happening in the lives of some of my close friends. I have been able to spend some time with friends recently. I’m back to having a separated home and workspace. Post latest anxiety attack me, is feeling so much lighter than pre latest anxiety attack me. Which let’s be real folks is a surprise I ain’t see coming. I still feel somewhat out of control, but in some ways, I’m okay with that.
I’m attempting to let myself accept the changes as they come. But WHEW. It is hard. But we are taking our time and moving at a pace that is best for me. I'll get caught up eventually.
The world is catching up to what most black folks already knew and we’re still HIGH KEY dealing with a world pandemic but also pretending everything is fine.
Basically, the world is dealing with its shit the way I deal with my shit. Avoidance.
But we not here to talk about the world. We here to talk about me and how I’m coping. And my response to that is....I’m not.
I am not dealing well. I actually had to up my dosage on my anti-depressants and most definitely had a full-blown anxiety attack the week before I went back to working in an office. And if I’m being honest. I’m tired. But the bright side is I’m not worn out. I feel like there is a lil light somewhere in this. I won’t call it the light at the end of the tunnel, but it is a light I needed.
So the positives, happy things are happening in the lives of some of my close friends. I have been able to spend some time with friends recently. I’m back to having a separated home and workspace. Post latest anxiety attack me, is feeling so much lighter than pre latest anxiety attack me. Which let’s be real folks is a surprise I ain’t see coming. I still feel somewhat out of control, but in some ways, I’m okay with that.
I’m attempting to let myself accept the changes as they come. But WHEW. It is hard. But we are taking our time and moving at a pace that is best for me. I'll get caught up eventually.
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